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Hairmilk is like that kid who smiles at you in the hallway but later steals your lunch money and tells the principal you bullied them
DM: "Hey, I just friended you!" Next message: "You better hope I don’t fail you."
Text: "I’m your friend now. That means I can ruin your life."
Tweet: "Hairmilk is the reason I have 3 detentions and a broken pencil."