Hahahasshole

My mom said, 'I'm so tired I could sleep for a week and still be tired,' and I laughed so hard I peed my pants.

My best friend said, 'I ate so much pizza I think I turned into a pizza box,' and I cried like a baby.

My dad said, 'I'm so old I can't remember my own age,' and I laughed so hard I fell off the couch.

My little sister said, 'I'm so hungry I could eat a whole cow,' and I laughed until my sides hurt.

My crush said, 'I'm so ugly I scare mirrors,' and I laughed so hard I snorted soda.

My dog said, 'I'm so tired I could sleep for a year,' and I laughed until I cried.

My grandma said, 'I'm so old I can't remember my own name,' and I laughed so hard I almost broke my phone.

My brother said, 'I'm so fat I could be a couch,' and I laughed until my face turned red.

My teacher said, 'I'm so tired I could sleep for a month,' and I laughed so hard I woke up my whole class.