Hagjag

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A witch who dances like a man who knows how to rock and roll and also knows how to cuss like a sailor.

That hagjag just kicked my ass at the club and said 'you're old and you're slow.'

She showed up at my door with a bottle of whiskey and a threat.

I saw her doing the twist on a broomstick and I almost peed myself.

A crone who slaps you with a spell and also knows how to shake it like a man who's been drinking too much beer.

She used a spell to make my dog bark at me and call me a fool.

I saw her in the grocery store and she made the bread rise by shouting at it.

She slapped my friend and said 'you're a loser and your hair is bad.'

A hag with the body of a beast and the hips of a man who’s seen the inside of a bar.

She did the twist so hard that my wall fell down.

She came to my party and said 'you're all a bunch of weaklings.'

She danced so well that my dog started doing the twist too.