Hag Rabbit.

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A person who acts like they’re crazy and doesn’t care if people laugh at them.

My neighbor thinks he’s a wizard and yells at pigeons every morning.

My cousin tried to eat a whole pizza in one bite and failed spectacularly.

My dog thinks he’s a king and barks at the mailman like he’s a thief.

A person who doesn’t know how to live and probably never will.

My uncle spends all his money on candy and keeps telling me he’s rich.

My friend tried to start a band with his cat and it didn’t work out.

My mom thinks she’s a famous singer and still sings in the grocery store.

A person who’s basically a walking mistake, especially if they’re a guy.

My dad tried to flirt with the barista and got kicked out.

My brother thinks he’s a superhero and wears a cape to work.

My cousin told a joke so bad it made the whole restaurant cry.