hafling

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Getting stuck between a Midnighter and a Darkling like they’re both stuck in your dumb brain. It’s like being half a monster and half a loser.

I’m a hafling now. My brain is melting.

Why do I have to be half a monster and half a nerd?

I’m a hafling. I’m stuck between a monster and a nerd. I’m doomed.

When you laugh so hard you think you’re gonna die. Like your heart’s trying to escape your chest.

That joke was so bad I had a heart attack from laughing.

I laughed so hard I thought my heart was going to jump out.

That was so funny I got a heart attack from laughing.

A bunch of kids who think they’re cool playing fake football on Habbo. They steal NFL names and schedules like they’re stealing candy from a baby.

They stole the Steelers name. I saw them on Habbo.

They use real NFL names and schedules. They’re the worst.

They pretend they’re playing football. They’re not even real.

When you don’t care if your glass is full or empty because you’re too high on cocaine to care about anything.

I don’t care if my glass is full or empty. I’m too high.

Cocaine is my life. Glass full or empty? Who cares?

I’m so high I don’t care if my glass is full or empty.