haenertsburg

I tried to grow tomatoes there. Now I have a hangover and a plot of weeds.

The cows are drunk. The villagers are confused. The mayor is both.

You don’t visit Haenertsburg. You get sent there by a drunk uncle.

The wheat is standing up straight. The barley is slumped over. The corn is passed out.

The village bar has a sign that says ‘No farming, just drinking.’

The only thing growing there is the number of empty bottles.

The priest drinks wine. The farmer drinks beer. The kids drink whatever is left.

They don’t say grace before meals. They say ‘pass the shots.’

The village has a farming festival. It’s just a bunch of people drinking and pretending they’re working.