Had a baby

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2 views · Added 12d ago · 3 definitions

1
When you're so messed up that you need two words to explain how bad it is. It’s like saying you're not just tired, you're dead tired and also hungover.
Had a baby? No, I had a baby and a dog and a bad decision.
Had a baby? I had a baby and a pizza and a regret.
Had a baby? I had a baby and a job and a very loud roommate.
by Slangipedia 12d ago
2
When a woman says she’s been off her cycle so long that she's wondering if she’s going to start growing hair on her face.
Had a baby? I haven't had a period since the last time I remembered what a period was.
Had a baby? I haven’t had a period since I got a tattoo and a life.
Had a baby? I haven’t had a period since I stopped caring about anything.
by Slangipedia 12d ago
3
When you poop so hard and so loud that it’s like you just gave birth to a screaming kid with a loudspeaker.
Had a baby? I just pooped so loud I think the neighbors heard it.
Had a baby? My poop was so big it looked like I just had a baby and a side dish.
Had a baby? I pooped so hard I think I broke my toilet.
by Slangipedia 12d ago
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