habd

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A fake birthday party that makes you feel like you’re missing out but you’re actually just annoyed.

My friend texted me 'Happy Almost Birthday' but I didn’t even have a real birthday yet.

She threw me a Habd party and I had no idea why I was wearing a hat.

He said 'Happy Almost Birthday' but I was still mad about last year's actual birthday.

When someone talks out of their ass and acts like they're a genius.

He said the moon was made of cheese and no one questioned him.

She told me aliens built the pyramids and I believed her for a minute.

He claimed he could speak dog and I almost signed up for his class.

Blabbering about something you’ve never seen, heard, or even thought about.

He said the ocean was pink and I asked why he didn’t tell me earlier.

She told me the sky was made of spaghetti and I believed her until it rained.

He claimed he knew the secret to life and it was just 'more cereal'.

A person who talks like they know what they're saying but they're just making it up.

He said he was a wizard and I believed him until he tried to turn me into a chicken.

She told me she could read my mind and I told her I had a secret.

He claimed he could talk to ghosts and I asked if they had bad breath.

When you lie so badly it’s like you’re trying to convince a toddler.

He said he won the lottery and I asked why he still had a job.

She told me she was a superhero and I asked if her cape was real.

He said he could fly and I asked if he had a plane.

When someone tells you what they think about something they’ve never even looked at.

He said the cake was the best he’d ever tasted and it was just store-bought.

She told me the movie was amazing and it was just a 30-minute short film.

He said the pizza was the best ever and it was just a slice from a gas station.