galloping asshole

Fresh
#dumb#moon#traffic

0 views · Added 3d ago · 6 definitions

1
A galloping asshole is someone so dumb they think the moon is made of cheese and still manage to fail at life.
He tried to eat the pizza box. It was still full.
He thinks traffic jams are a conspiracy.
He told his dog he was the president. The dog ignored him.
by Slangipedia 3d ago
2
A galloping asshole is someone who makes bad decisions and then blames the universe for their problems.
He married a sock. It didn't work out.
He tried to fly using a fan and a ladder. He fell.
He told his boss he was a wizard. He got fired.
by Slangipedia 3d ago
3
A galloping asshole is someone who is so clueless they think the sun is just a really bright light from a distant lamp.
He tried to talk to the sun. It didn’t reply.
He took a nap during a fire alarm. He didn’t wake up until lunch.
He told his teacher he could read minds. He got a D.
by Slangipedia 3d ago
4
A galloping asshole is someone who thinks they're the smartest person in the room, even when they're clearly not.
He yelled at the TV because he thought it was making fun of him.
He tried to fix the internet with a hammer. It got worse.
He told his mom he was a genius. She laughed.
by Slangipedia 3d ago
5
A galloping asshole is someone who doesn't know what they're doing but still insists they're the best at everything.
He tried to cook breakfast and burned the house down.
He took over a game of chess and lost in three moves.
He told his friend he was the king of the world. His friend said 'nope.'
by Slangipedia 3d ago
6
A galloping asshole is someone who is so bad at everything they make even the dumbest people look smart.
He tried to play guitar and broke all the strings.
He tried to build a treehouse and it collapsed.
He told the police he was a superhero. They gave him a ticket.
by Slangipedia 3d ago
xs