Slangipedia - Slang Dictionary

1

A Galendar is like a boss who decides if you get to go out or stay home and eat pizza while your girlfriend/wife cries into her phone.

I can't go to the concert. The Galendar said no.

Why did you miss my birthday? The Galendar didn’t like you.

He texted me: 'The Galendar said we’re going to the bar.' I was confused.

2

The Galendar is the reason you’re stuck at home with a pizza and no pants on.

Why did you skip my dinner? The Galendar had a meltdown.

I had to cancel our date because the Galendar was in charge.

He said, 'The Galendar said you can’t leave.' I was like, 'What?'

3

The Galendar is a magical calendar that only your girlfriend/wife can control and it always lies.

She said the Galendar said we were going to the movies. We went to the mall instead.

He asked if we were going to dinner. The Galendar said no.

I texted her: 'Is the Galendar evil today?' She said, 'Yes.'

4

The Galendar is like your girlfriend/wife’s pet and it can kick your ass if you don’t do what it says.

The Galendar kicked my ass because I missed our date.

He said the Galendar was mad at me for eating pizza.

I tried to leave. The Galendar said, 'You can’t leave.' I stayed.

5

The Galendar is your girlfriend/wife’s calendar and it has a mind of its own. It’s a beast.

The Galendar had a mind of its own. I had to stay home.

She said the Galendar was a beast. I believed her.

He texted me, 'The Galendar is a beast. Don’t leave.' I was scared.

6

The Galendar is like your girlfriend/wife’s calendar and it’s the only thing that matters when you want to go out.

I asked if I could go out. The Galendar said no.

He said the Galendar was the only thing that mattered.

She said, 'The Galendar says you can’t go.' I had to stay home.