G-tails

I got caught eating pizza at 3 a. m. because I was tired and the cheese was calling my name.

I forgot my homework because my cat knocked it into the trash and then laughed at me.

I missed the bus because I was too busy arguing with a pigeon about whose turn it was to be cool.

I failed the test because the pencil broke and I had to borrow a crayon from my neighbor's dog.

I got into a fight with my sock because it wouldn't stop talking to me.

I walked into class late because I was debating with a cloud about the meaning of life.

I got into trouble because I used glitter instead of paint and the teacher cried.

I skipped school because my shoelaces started a mutiny and wouldn't tie up.

I got kicked out of the cafeteria because I tried to eat the tables.