facts of life

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the truth about how people make babies, told to a kid like they’re the last hope of mankind

My mom tried to explain it like I was going to die if I didn’t get it.

He asked why it happened and got a lecture about sperm and eggs like it was a crime.

She said it was ‘the facts of life’ and I still don’t know what that means.

when adults think they’re being cool by telling a kid how people make babies, but it’s just gross

My dad said it like he was explaining a magic trick and not a bodily function.

My teacher told me it was ‘normal’ and I still think it’s the worst thing ever.

He said it like I was supposed to be proud of it, but I just wanted to die.

the moment you realize your parents are just two people who somehow made you and it’s the worst thing ever

I thought I was going to be born from a miracle, not from my parents’ messed-up life.

They told me about it like it was a sport and I was the loser.

I asked why it happened and got a whole lecture about how it’s ‘just how it is’ and I still don’t get it.