Factitionist

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4 views · Added 13d ago · 5 definitions

A person who knows so many facts they can guess what’s going to happen just by throwing facts at it like it’s a dartboard.

I told my teacher the exact time the bus would crash because I knew the speed of the bus and the size of the ditch.

My cousin predicted his girlfriend would break up with him because he knew she had a crush on his brother.

I knew the test would be about dinosaurs because I remembered every single fact from the last 10 quizzes.

Someone who has so many facts they can tell the future just by shoving facts into the air like confetti.

My friend told me the president would quit tomorrow because he had 100 facts about his bad mood.

I knew my dog would run away because I knew the exact number of treats he had eaten that week.

My mom guessed my little brother would fail math because he had 3 facts about how bad he was at numbers.

A person who has so many facts they can guess what will happen even when they’re half-asleep and still talking about facts.

I fell asleep during class, but I still told the teacher the exact time the fire alarm would go off.

My brother predicted his friend would spill his coffee because he had 7 facts about his coffee addiction.

I told my friend the exact time he would get a text from his crush because I knew every single fact about his phone.

Someone so full of facts they can guess what will happen before it even happens, like they have a fact radar.

I knew my friend would fail the test before he even took it because I had 20 facts about how bad he was at math.

I told my dog the exact time he would poop because I had 15 facts about his eating habits.

My dad guessed the weather would be bad because he had 50 facts about the clouds.

A person who knows so many facts they can guess what will happen even when they’re not trying, like they have facts in their blood.

I told my teacher the exact time the bell would ring because I had facts in my blood.

My cousin guessed his friend would fall off the bike because he had facts in his blood.

I knew my little brother would eat all the cookies because I had facts in my blood.