Facial Blindness

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When you can't tell your mom from a barista because your face is so messed up from all the cum in your eyes.

I walked into my mom's house and thought she was the guy who brought me coffee every morning.

My face looked like a raccoon who got hit by a truck and then cried in a dumpster.

I tried to smile and it looked like I was about to cry and then vomit.

A face so ruined by cum in your eyes you think your friend is your uncle and your uncle is your friend.

I saw my friend at the store and said hi to my uncle instead.

My face was so bad my dog ran away from me.

I tried to say hello and it came out like I was confessing a crime.

You see someone and you're like 'who the hell is that?' because your face is a disaster from all the cum in your eyes.

I looked at my boss and said 'are you my long lost brother?'

My face was so bad I scared my barista into giving me free coffee.

I saw my neighbor and I thought he was a ghost.