Faceocks

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2 views · Added 13d ago · 6 definitions

A person who lives in Facebook and forgets how to breathe.

I just posted my breakfast and my dog’s opinion on it. Still no likes.

I changed my status to ‘bored’ and now my mom is messaging me every 10 minutes.

I spent 2 hours arguing with a stranger over a comment. That’s not normal.

A human who thinks Facebook is a real job.

I got a promotion for liking 500 posts in one day. It’s not fair.

I turned off my phone because I was too busy being famous on Facebook.

I posted a picture of my sock and now it has 12 likes. I’m rich.

A person who would rather chat with a cat on Facebook than talk to their friend.

My best friend is a cat I follow on Facebook. I’ve never met the real one.

I sent a message to my mom and she replied with a photo of her cat’s breakfast.

I started a group chat with 3 of my friends and 12 of their cats.

Someone who lives in their phone and thinks Facebook is their life.

I didn’t eat dinner because I was too busy commenting on my uncle’s post.

I got engaged through Facebook messages. My parents didn’t even know.

I posted a photo of my forehead and now I’m a celebrity.

A human who would rather fight on Facebook than in real life.

I got into a 3-hour argument with my neighbor over a comment. He still hasn’t responded.

I blocked my brother for not liking my post. He’s still my brother.

I started a Facebook fight with my ex and now my friends are on both sides.

A person who spends more time on Facebook than they do in the real world.

I met my girlfriend on Facebook. We haven’t talked in real life yet.

I posted my dream and now it’s just a status.

I know my dog’s favorite song because I posted it on Facebook.