facedrunking

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You drop your phone at a party and instead of finding it, you decide to post on Facebook like you're trying to prove how wasted you are.

I just ate three tacos and now I'm a taco god. 🌮

My pants are on fire and I'm not even mad.

This party is the worst. I want to die. But I also want to live. So I'm confused.

You stumble in after a night of drinking and instead of sleeping, you type out the worst stuff ever on Facebook because you're too proud to be sober.

My mom is watching me right now and I'm crying. I hate my life.

I just yelled at a pizza and it cried back.

I don't know who I am anymore. I think I'm a cat.

You're so drunk you can't think straight, and instead of passing out, you post on Facebook like you're trying to impress the whole world.

I just fought a chicken and I won. It was glorious.

I'm not a loser. I'm just a sleeping loser.

I just told my boss I'm a wizard. He believed me.