FaceBook Woodwork

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When you finally log on to Facebook after being dead for years and post something that makes your old friends go 'What the hell is this?'

I just posted a photo of my cat wearing a hat. My ex said, 'You’re still alive? What’s the point?'

My cousin tagged me in a group chat. I replied, 'I’m not dead yet, okay?'

I posted a status about my divorce. My mom said, 'You didn’t even tell me!'

Posting on Facebook like you just woke up from a 10-year nap and you’re mad you didn’t get a bonus for it

I posted 'I’m back, and I’m here to stay.' My friend said, 'You’re only here for the free Wi-Fi.'

I posted a picture of my new beard. My uncle said, 'You finally grew some hair? I thought you were a ghost.'

I posted about my new job. My old coworkers said, 'You didn’t even say goodbye!'

When you post something on Facebook and your old friends are so shocked they probably called the police

I posted a video of my dance moves. My old classmates said, 'You used to be a disaster, and now you’re a full-blown monster.'

I posted about my new house. My old neighbor said, 'You didn’t even say you were moving!'

I posted a status about my new tattoo. My brother said, 'You finally got some ink? I thought you were dead!'