facebook squirrel

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a face book squirrel is a person who comments on everything you post like they’re your ex and they still check your feed.

Why did you eat pizza for breakfast? That’s the worst.

You think you’re funny? You’re not. You’re just loud.

I’m watching this post like it’s the final scene of a movie and you’re the sad kid who didn’t get the part.

a face book squirrel is someone who posts dumb stuff on your posts just to make you feel bad.

Your cat is cute, but I’ve seen better.

You think you’re clever? I’ve seen your dog’s face and it’s better.

This post is so boring. I fell asleep reading it.

a face book squirrel is a person who comments on your posts like they're your mom and they don't know when to stop talking.

Why did you wear that shirt? It looks like it was stolen from a trash can.

You think you're funny? I've seen your dog's face and it was funnier.

This post is so bad. I’m gonna cry.

a face book squirrel is someone who comments on everything you post like they're your annoying neighbor who thinks they're your friend.

Your dog is cute, but I’ve seen better.

You think you’re funny? You’re not. You’re just loud.

This post is so boring. I fell asleep reading it.

a face book squirrel is someone who comments on your posts like they're your ex and they're still mad about your pizza obsession.

Why did you eat pizza for breakfast? That’s the worst.

You think you’re clever? I’ve seen your dog’s face and it was better.

This post is so bad. I’m gonna cry.