facebook mom

Fresh
#single mom#lazy#toilet employee

0 views · Added 3d ago · 7 definitions

1
A lazy single mom who sits on her ass scrolling Facebook all day while her kid drinks bleach out of a juice box in a poopy diaper because she thinks parenting is just a side hustle.
"Just got a new job at the mall. My kid is now on a juice box diet."
"My kid cried for 2 hours. I took a selfie."
"My kid is now a full-time employee of the toilet."
by Slangipedia 3d ago
2
A mom who posts stupid memes about minions and rednecks like she's the queen of the internet, but she can't even remember her kid's birthday.
"Minions are better than my ex."
"My kid is a minion. My ex is a redneck."
"My kid failed 3rd grade. I posted a minion meme."
by Slangipedia 3d ago
3
A middle-aged mom who posts every. single. detail. of her life on Facebook and comments on every post like she’s the judge of the whole world.
"My kid got an A+ on a math test. Commenting on every post."
"My kid got a D. I posted it. And commented on 10 other posts."
"My kid's best friend got a puppy. I posted it. And commented on 5 other posts."
by Slangipedia 3d ago
4
A fake mom who posts like she’s the best parent ever, but her kid has to wear the same pants for a week because she’s too cheap to buy new ones.
"My kid is the best. I just posted it."
"My kid's pants smell like a landfill. I posted a perfect photo."
"My kid cried for 3 hours. I posted a perfect photo."
by Slangipedia 3d ago
5
A mom who posts on her kid's wall like she's the best parent ever, but she doesn’t show up for court days and never sends money.
"My kid posted a photo of me. I commented like I was parent of the year."
"I didn't show up for court. But I posted on my kid's wall."
"I haven’t paid child support in 3 years. But I posted on my kid's wall."
by Slangipedia 3d ago
6
A mom who would rather update her Facebook status than actually take care of her kid, even if that kid is crying like a baby in a puddle of spaghetti.
"My kid is in a puddle of spaghetti. I posted a status."
"My kid is crying. I posted a status."
"My kid is on the floor. I posted a status."
by Slangipedia 3d ago
7
A mom who posts like her family is perfect, but behind the scenes, the whole family is screaming at each other like they’re in a horror movie.
"My family is perfect. They all just screamed at me."
"My kid posted a photo. We all fought after it."
"My family is perfect. They’re fighting like they’re in a horror movie."
by Slangipedia 3d ago
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