facebook minion

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those annoying Facebook followers who comment on everything you post like they’re your personal therapist and you’re their emotional wreck

'You look sad in this photo. Are you sad?'

'This post is deep. You must be deep inside.'

'You posted this at 3 AM. Are you dead?'

the worst kind of Facebook friends who comment on every single thing you post like they’re paid to do it and you’re their paycheck

'This is a great post. I like it.'

'You updated your status. Congrats.'

'You posted a picture. That’s cool.'

the creepy Facebook groupies who comment on everything you post like they’re your ex and they still think you’re their soulmate

'You look happy. I miss you.'

'This post is about you. It’s also about me.'

'I comment on your posts because I can’t stop thinking about you.'

those Facebook fiends who comment on everything you post like they’re your mom and they’re trying to make you feel better

'You look tired. Did you sleep?'

'This post is about your life. Are you okay?'

'You posted this. I know you’re sad.'

the Facebook fanatics who comment on everything you post like they’re your best friend and they’re trying to be your best friend forever

'You posted this. I know you’re happy.'

'This is the best post ever. I love it.'

'You’re my favorite person. I comment on your posts.'

those Facebook freaks who comment on everything you post like they’re your boss and they’re trying to make you feel like you’re working

'You posted this at work. Are you working?'

'This post is a distraction. You should be working.'

'You posted this. You should be working.'