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I thought she was a goddess. Turns out she has a face like a raccoon who just got hit by a truck.

He had a six-pack on his profile. In real life, he had a six-pack of beer and a stomach like a balloon.

She looked like a supermodel. Then I saw her in the grocery store. She was wearing pajamas and eating cereal out of a bowl.

His Facebook picture was perfect. In real life, he looked like he’d been living in a sewer for a month.

She had a perfect smile on her profile. In real life, her teeth looked like they were painted on.

He looked like a heartthrob. Then I saw him in the rain. He looked like a drowned rat.

She had a perfect body on her profile. When I met her, she had a body like a potato.

His face looked like it was made of marble on Facebook. In real life, it looked like it was made of dirt and sadness.

He had a perfect beard on his profile. In real life, it looked like a goat had taken over his face.

She had a perfect face on her profile. When I saw her in person, I thought she had a face like a raccoon who had been hit by a car.

He looked like a superhero on Facebook. In real life, he looked like a superhero who had been run over by a bus.

Her profile was like a poster. In real life, she looked like a poster that had been soaked in mud.

He looked like a model on Facebook. When I saw him in real life, he looked like he had been living in a cave for a year.

She had perfect skin on her profile. When I met her, her skin looked like it was covered in dirt and oil.

He looked like a rockstar on Facebook. In real life, he looked like a rockstar who had been run over by a truck.