Facebook Detective

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3 views · Added 13d ago · 6 definitions

A fancy way to say you're peeping on someone's Facebook like a pervert in a hallway.

I'm the Facebook Detective, and I know you changed your profile picture to a cat.

I saw your ex liking your post. I'm not a detective, I'm a psycho.

You think you're sneaky, but I'm the Facebook Detective and I know you're still single.

When you're so obsessed with someone's Facebook that you're basically their ghost.

I'm the Facebook Detective, and I know you're lying about being busy.

You think you're hiding, but I'm the Facebook Detective and I saw your secret message.

You're not hiding from me, I'm the Facebook Detective and I found you.

A nickname for someone who's too lazy to just ask, but still checks up on people on Facebook.

I'm the Facebook Detective because I don't want to talk to you, I just want to know your life.

You're the Facebook Detective and I'm the one who gets annoyed.

I'm not stalking you, I'm just the Facebook Detective doing my job.

A title you take on when you're too proud to say you're just looking at someone's Facebook.

I'm not just looking, I'm the Facebook Detective and I know your secrets.

You're the Facebook Detective, and I'm the one who gets caught.

I'm the Facebook Detective, and I'm not even ashamed.

When you're so into someone's Facebook that you think you're a real detective.

I'm the Facebook Detective and I solved the mystery of your bad mood.

You're the Facebook Detective, and I'm the one who's still single.

I'm not just checking, I'm the Facebook Detective and I'm solving your life.

A name you give yourself when you're too much of a drama queen to just say you're looking at someone's Facebook.

I'm not just looking, I'm the Facebook Detective and I'm living my best life.

You're the Facebook Detective and I'm the one who's tired of your drama.

I'm the Facebook Detective, and I'm not even sorry.