Facebook Coma

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2 views · Added 14d ago · 2 definitions

When a Facebook user gets so sucked into scrolling through status updates and poking around profiles that they forget how to think straight. Usually happens when they're too lazy to do anything else.

I was supposed to be working, but I spent 4 hours reading my ex's status updates. My brain is now a soft serve cone.

I saw a meme about a cat and now I'm arguing with my cousin's uncle about which cat is better. This is not a real problem.

I tried to go to sleep, but my phone was still on. Now I’m reading 200 status updates. I might as well be dead.

by Slangipedia 14d ago

A person who lives on Facebook so much that they ignore their job, their family, and their own sanity. They only know how to talk to people through likes and comments.

My mom hasn't left her house in 3 weeks. She's been messaging her high school crush non-stop. She's like a ghost in a group chat.

I tried to talk to my brother, but he said, 'I'll respond in 10 minutes, I'm fighting with my mom on Facebook.'

My dad got fired because he spent the whole meeting looking at Facebook. He said, 'It was a status update war.'

by Slangipedia 14d ago