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When you’re snooping on someone’s Facebook but you’re too much of a coward to look like a real stalker.

I saw her ex’s post and thought, 'Why is she still single?'

He changed his profile pic again. What’s wrong with him?

Why does she post about her cat every day? Is that her way of saying 'I’m sad'?

It’s like being a spy, but you’re too lazy to dress up and you just use your phone.

I scrolled through her photos like I was checking out a buffet.

He had 12 new friends. What is he, a magician?

Why is her dog following her everywhere? Is that a real thing?

You’re checking someone’s Facebook like it’s a treasure map, but you’re not ready to admit it.

I found her vacation photo and said, 'That’s not fair.'

He posted about his new job. What’s next? A new wife?

She’s got 100 likes on a post about her coffee. Is that a hobby?

You’re looking at someone’s Facebook like it’s a gossip column, but you’re too scared to say anything.

I saw her post about her break-up and said, 'That’s not fair.'

He’s got 20 new friends. What’s he hiding?

Why does she post about her food every day? Is she trying to say something?

You’re on someone’s Facebook like it’s a crime scene, but you’re not ready to go to jail for it.

I looked at her post and said, 'That’s not fair.'

He changed his bio. What’s next? A new name?

Why is her cat following her everywhere? Is that a real thing?