Fabrucked

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2 views · Added 13d ago · 5 definitions

1
Getting so drunk you can’t tell your balls from your elbows and you’re crying over a bag of chips.
I drank 12 beers and now I’m sobbing at the snack aisle like it betrayed me.
He was so fabrucked he tried to kiss the pizza delivery guy and missed.
She passed out on the couch and started talking to her cat in Spanish.
2
Being so wasted you think your friend is a ninja and you're fighting a microwave.
I thought my cousin was a ninja and tried to karate chop the microwave. It didn’t work.
He was fighting the fridge like it was a rival in a duel.
She tried to tell me her dog was a wizard and it was just a normal dog.
3
So drunk you think the toilet is a throne and you're demanding a crown.
I sat on the toilet like it was a royal throne and yelled, 'I want my crown back!'
He tried to crown his brother king and it was just a bunch of confetti and bad decisions.
She was so fabrucked she tried to marry the sink and got engaged to the shower.
4
So wasted you think you're a superhero and you're fighting imaginary villains.
I thought I was Batman and I started fighting the neighbor's raccoon like it was the Joker.
He was super fabrucked and tried to save the world with a broom.
She thought she was Wonder Woman and tried to leap over a couch like it was a chasm.
5
So drunk you can’t walk straight and you’re talking to the wall like it’s your ex.
I was so fabrucked I tried to apologize to the wall and it just stared back.
He was talking to the fridge like it was his ex and it didn’t respond.
She tried to flirt with the mirror and it just blinked at her.
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