fabio's mother

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A mythical creature that some people swear is a fat kid who never left the house, others think it’s a cat that got hit by a truck and then a bus.

My math teacher said she’s the reason I failed algebra.

My uncle saw her eating a whole pizza by herself at 2 AM.

My dog ran away screaming when he saw her.

A monster that eats your lunch and then your soul if you don’t bring snacks.

I brought a sandwich and she ate it in front of me like it was a challenge.

My friend tried to sneak a snack and got yelled at by her.

She looked at my empty lunch bag and smiled like a serial killer.

A human who somehow manages to be both a whale and a lion at the same time, and it’s terrifying.

She walked into the room and the whole class shut up.

She sat down and the chair broke like it was a joke.

She yelled at the principal and he ran away.