EBENEZER BALL SQUEEZER

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the guy in a white coat who shoves his finger up your butt while yelling at you to blow your nose like a trumpet.

He looked like he was doing a math problem on my butt.

I swear he took a bite out of my nugget pouch.

He told me I had the lungs of a dying whale.

the man who sticks his hand in your butt crack and yells, 'You're not a kid anymore!'

He told me I was a 'nugget failure' and made me cough like I had a frog in my throat.

He grabbed my nugget pouch like it was a birthday present.

He said I had the breath of a sewer rat.

the doctor who shoves his finger up your butt and says, 'You're gonna cough or I'm gonna yell at you.'

He stuck his finger so far up my butt I could taste his coffee.

He told me I had the lungs of a dying donkey.

He made me cough so hard I thought my nugget pouch was gonna explode.