1
A giant melon that jiggles when you laugh at it.
Hey, look at that eavis, it’s like a water balloon made of meat!
That eavis is so big, it’s gonna knock out the whole class!
Eavis, you’re like a cheeseburger with no bread!
eavis
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2
A creepy guy in the Unreal Community who looked like a goat that got hit by a cheese truck.
That eavis is like a goat that got hit by a cheese truck!
Eavis, you’re the goatse of the Unreal Community!
That eavis is so creepy, he could scare a ghost!
3
A weird tall guy who looks like he came from another planet.
Eavis is so tall, he could touch the ceiling with his toes!
That eavis is like a walking alien!
Eavis, you look like you just came from Mars!
4
A guy so cool, he makes your life worth living.
Eavis is so cool, he makes my life worth living!
That eavis is like a superhero with no powers!
Eavis, you’re the best thing since sliced bread!
5
A penis so big and perfect, it makes girls pass out from pure happiness.
Eavis has a penis so big, it makes girls pass out!
That eavis’s cock is so perfect, it’s like a masterpiece!
Eavis, your penis is so good, it makes girls forget to breathe!
6
A narcissistic Atlanta legend who steals hoes like they’re going out of style.
Eavis is like a ho-stealing machine!
That eavis is so narcissistic, he thinks he’s the only one who exists!
Eavis, you’re the ho-stealing king of Atlanta!
7
The most beautiful person on the planet who could make your brain explode with admiration.
Eavie Mae is so beautiful, she could make your brain explode!
That eavis is like a goddess walking among mortals!
Eavie Mae is so attractive, even the moon looks jealous!