eat uranium day

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on june 1st eat uranium day is when you get to chow down on uranium like it’s pizza and the feds are too busy crying to stop you

i ate uranium today and the feds just sent me a coupon for a cheeseburger

my dad ate uranium and now he’s radioactive and weird

i told my teacher i was eating uranium and she said i was being a bad student

on june 1st eat uranium day is when the government gives you a pass to eat uranium like it’s a snack and you don’t have to worry about dying

ate uranium today and my dog turned green

i ate uranium and my mom said i was being a bad kid

ate uranium at lunch and now my desk is melting

on june 1st eat uranium day is when you get to stuff your face with uranium and the feds just sigh and say ‘whatever’

ate uranium and my pants caught on fire

i ate uranium and now my voice sounds like a robot

ate uranium and my teacher gave me a zero