1
A pig in a human body who can't even weld straight
He tried to fix my toaster and now it's on fire.
His welds look like a toddler threw glue at a wall.
He called me 'Chief' and I called him 'Dumbass'.
Easton the Welder
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2
The human version of a broken toaster
He showed up to my party and brought a broken toaster.
He tried to weld my bike and now it's a death trap.
He asked me for a date and I said 'No, thanks, I’m already married to my toaster.'
3
A walking disaster with a welding torch and no brains
He set my garage on fire while trying to fix a pipe.
He tried to weld my dog and now it's a walking mess.
He said he was a 'master welder' and I said 'Please, I’ve seen better in a dumpster.'