east clubbin

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When you’re so drunk you think you’re a superhero and everything is on fire.

I woke up in a pool and thought I was fighting a dragon.

I tried to text my mom and sent a 500-word essay about why tacos are the best.

I yelled at a pigeon and it ran away like it had a job to do.

When you’re so wasted you think you’re the president and everyone else is your enemy.

I told my dad he was a traitor for not eating pizza for breakfast.

I tried to declare war on the fridge and it just opened.

I asked my dog if he was on my side and he barked at me like I was stupid.

When you’re so drunk you think you’re a wizard and everything is magic.

I waved my hand and the TV turned off like it was enchanted.

I tried to cast a spell on my brother and he just laughed and said it didn’t work.

I turned my mom’s coffee into a potion and she got super strong.