earthy-crunchy

1 views · Added 4d ago · 3 definitions

A person or thing that smells like a compost bin and thinks kale is the best revenge against the world. They eat veggies like they're gonna die tomorrow and yell at you for using plastic bags.

My cousin is so earthy-crunchy, she grew her own beard out of lentils.

I tried to buy a soda from a tree-hugger, and he threw a banana peel at me.

My mom says I'm earthy-crunchy because I wear socks with sandals and drink green smoothies.

by Slangipedia 4d ago

The breakfast of people who think they're saving the planet. It’s like a salad for your mouth, but with too much oats and not enough sanity.

My granola is so crunchy, it could probably break a bone.

I ate so much granola, I turned into a walking cereal box.

My dad’s granola is so dry, it could be used as a weapon.

by Slangipedia 4d ago

A person who thinks wearing a tie is a sin and probably once tried to start a fire with a match and a dead leaf.

My neighbor is a hippie who talks to his plants and wears socks with sandals.

My brother thinks a hippie is a type of sandwich.

My teacher says I’m a hippie because I once drew a mustache on a portrait of Einstein.

by Slangipedia 4d ago