earth sause

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the liquid that comes from your brain when you’re too dumb to drink coffee

My math teacher said I’d fail if I didn’t stop drinking earth sause.

I tried to pour earth sause on my toast and it just cried.

My dog drinks earth sause and thinks he’s a king.

the stuff you drink when you think you’re cool but you’re just wet

I told my friend I was drinking earth sause and he said I was a baby.

At the party, I drank earth sause and no one asked me to dance.

My mom said earth sause was the juice of a sad lemon.

the cheapest drink you can get and it still thinks it’s the best

I bought earth sause for a dollar and it still talked to me.

My dad drinks earth sause and says it’s the only thing that respects him.

I tried to mix earth sause with soda and it just gave me a headache.