earth momma

Fresh Trending

1 views · Added 4d ago · 3 definitions

a hippie mom who loves everything she sees and never questions why your pants are made of hemp and your hair is full of leaves

My earth momma said my lunch was 'a spiritual experience', it was just a sandwich and a bag of chips.

She gave me a hug that felt like a full body massage from a tree.

She told me my crush was 'a soulmate', he had a mullet and wore socks with sandals.

a woman so big she makes gravity look lazy, best not to challenge her when you're drunk and wearing socks

She walked into the room and the floor shook, I thought the earth had just yawned.

She gave me a high-five and I felt like I was going to float away.

She said 'you're welcome' after I fell into a pile of beans, I think that was a compliment.

a woman with so much hair down there it looks like she’s wearing a bush and a beard, and it’s from the 70s

She walked in and I thought I had just seen a goat with a mustache.

Her twat looked like it had a life of its own, it was like a whole new person.

She told me I could 'ask her anything', I didn’t know I had that option.