Early November Gift

Current Trending

1 views · Added 14d ago · 3 definitions

1
A crummy present you get from a friend in early November because they forgot about you and felt guilty.
My friend gave me a bag of stale chips. I cried. They laughed. They’re dead to me.
He sent me a broken pen. I used it to stab my math test. It still didn’t work.
She gave me a used sock. I wore it to school. The teacher thought I was going through a tough time.
2
A slap in the face from your friend in early November, wrapped in paper and tied with hope.
He gave me a whoopee cushion. I blew it. The whole class heard. I died a little.
She gave me a tiny eraser. I tried to erase my embarrassment. It didn’t work.
He gave me a pencil that didn’t work. I wrote my essay in crayon. It was a disaster.
3
A present that makes you wonder why your friend still talks to you in early November.
He gave me a rubber chicken. I tried to use it as a pillow. It woke me up at night.
She gave me a coupon for a fake pizza. I used it. I got a real pizza. I was confused.
He gave me a whoopee cushion. I blew it. The teacher gave me a detention. I was ruined.
xs