EARL NIGHTINGALE RULE

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A guy from Chicago who teaches people how to be rich and happy, but he's also a total poser who thinks he's a god.

I'm listening to Earl Nightingale because my mom says he's the only reason I have a job.

Why is this guy on the radio? He just talks about success like it's a religion.

I pay for his tapes and he still thinks I'm a failure.

A man who made a bunch of tapes about being rich and popular, and he's still trying to convince everyone he's not a fraud.

I bought all his tapes and now I'm broke and confused.

He says I can be rich if I just think about it harder.

I don't need his tapes, I just need a better life.

A guy from Chicago who yells about success until you want to punch him in the face.

He yells so much about success, I might actually scream at him.

I tried to be successful like he says, now I'm just tired.

He's like a broken tape player, just looping the same crap.

A man who thinks he's a guru, but he's just a guy from Chicago who sells tapes and doesn't know what he's talking about.

He sells tapes like they're magic, but they're just paper.

He says I can be rich if I believe in him, but I don't.

He’s the reason I bought a tape and now I’m stuck with it.

A guy who thinks he's the king of success, but he's just a guy from Chicago who yells into a tape recorder.

He yells into a recorder like he's recording a confession.

He’s the king of success, but I’m the king of annoyance.

I don’t need a king, I need a break.

A man who makes people listen to tapes about being rich, even though he’s probably broke himself.

He tells me I can be rich, but I can’t even afford lunch.

He sells tapes like they're the key to happiness.

I listened to his tape and now I'm broke and confused.