daddybunkins

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4 views · Added 16d ago · 5 definitions

a dad who talks too much and thinks he's cool even when he's not

Dad: 'I was a rockstar in my day.' Me: 'You were a dadstar in your day.'

At the park, Dad yells, 'I used to bench press a cow!' No one believes him.

Dad tries to explain TikTok to me. It's like watching a dinosaur try to use a phone.

a man who thinks he's the king of the house but can't even remember his own passwords

Dad: 'I know all the answers.' Then he forgets his own phone password.

He tries to fix the Wi-Fi. It ends in tears and a reboot.

He claims he can hack the government. He can't even log into his email.

a dad who's always bragging but never actually does anything

Dad: 'I was in the army!' Me: 'You were in the dad army.'

He says he's a 'business man.' He runs a lemonade stand on weekends.

He claims he's a 'master chef.' His 'special' is burnt toast and ketchup.

a dad who thinks he's tough but can't handle a little kid's tantrum

He yells at the grocery store because the cereal is out of stock.

He tries to be scary but screams like a toddler.

He gets mad because I spilled juice on his pants. He cried.

a dad who talks like he's in a movie but no one cares

He says, 'I will conquer this mountain!' Then he trips over the couch.

He does a dramatic exit. It's just him walking out of the room.

He tries to be a hero. He can't even catch a falling cup.