Daddy thighs

My cousin’s dad has daddy thighs. He once lifted my whole family and yelled at my uncle for eating too much pizza.

My gym teacher has daddy thighs. He can do 100 push-ups and still has time to curse at the lunch lady.

My dad has daddy thighs. He once squatted a cow and told me to stop crying because I was ‘too weak for this world’.

My uncle has daddy thighs. He once prayed so hard the church ceiling fell and he still had time to yell at my cousin for stealing his cookies.

My pastor has daddy thighs. He once turned water into wine and still had time to laugh at my jokes.

My dad has daddy thighs. He once walked on water and still had time to tell me I was ‘the worst kid ever’.

Jonah Fields has daddy thighs. He once ran a marathon and still had time to tell me I was ‘the worst’.

Jonah Fields has daddy thighs. He once fought a dragon and still had time to yell at his mom for burning the pizza.

Jonah Fields has daddy thighs. He once turned time backwards and still had time to tell me I was ‘the worst kid in the world’.