Dad Pat

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A Dad Pat is like getting smacked by a pillow that’s been dipped in swear words and then microwaved.

My dad gave me a Dad Pat after I failed math again.

The coach gave me a Dad Pat for not showing up to practice.

My uncle gave me a Dad Pat after I said my mom’s bad joke.

It’s so good it should be illegal. Like a warm hug from a swear-filled dad.

That Dad Pat from my dad made me feel like I could win the lottery.

The principal gave me a Dad Pat after I cried in the hallway.

My brother gave me a Dad Pat after I ate all his pizza.

It’s when a dad figure pats you like you’re a kid who just got caught eating cake for breakfast.

My dad gave me a Dad Pat after I spilled juice on my homework.

The teacher gave me a Dad Pat after I drew a mustache on the principal’s face.

My cousin gave me a Dad Pat after I ate all his candy.

It’s when a dad figure pats a dog like it’s a kid who just got caught eating cake for breakfast.

My dad gave my dog a Dad Pat after it ate my homework.

The mailman gave my dog a Dad Pat after it barked at his bike.

My uncle gave my dog a Dad Pat after it stole his sandwich.