dad mag

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A woman who lures men with kids like they’re free candy and promises of no bedtime battles.

'I just want a dad who doesn’t yell at me during my cereal time.'

'He asked me out after I saved his kid from a lava lamp.'

'She brought my kid a toy and my wallet a bruise.'

A woman who hooks up with men who have kids and hope they’ll forget about their own.

'He said he’d take my kid to the park. He took my kid to the park and left me in a parking lot.'

'She brought my kid to the zoo. She brought me to the ER.'

'He asked me out. He brought my kid to my kid's birthday party.'

A woman who’s like a buffet for men who can’t handle their own kids and want someone else’s.

'He said he’d help with the kid. He screamed at the kid and ate my leftovers.'

'She took my kid to the movies. She took my patience to the grave.'

'He brought my kid a gift. He brought me a migraine.'