daaaade

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A guy who acts like he’s the king of Miami-Dade, even though he’s just a regular dude with a bad haircut and worse fashion sense.

Daaaade, you look like you just ran over a sock factory.

Daaaade, why are you wearing socks with sandals? It’s 90 degrees out.

Daaaade, you’re the reason my mom got a second job.

A man who thinks he’s the most important person in Miami-Dade, even though he’s just another guy who forgot his lunch.

Daaaade, you forgot your lunch again. You’re like a walking reminder of your own failure.

Daaaade, you’re the reason the lunch lady hates Mondays.

Daaaade, I swear you’re gonna turn into a sandwich if you keep this up.

A guy from Miami-Dade who talks too much, eats too much, and still somehow thinks he’s the best.

Daaaade, you just ate three whole pizzas and still think you’re the best. Please stop.

Daaaade, you’re like a walking buffet with a ego.

Daaaade, if you talk any more, you’ll turn into a loudspeaker.

A man who thinks he’s the reason Miami-Dade exists, even though he’s just a guy who can’t tie his shoes.

Daaaade, you can’t even tie your shoes. How are you the reason Miami-Dade exists?

Daaaade, you’re like a loaf of bread with no structure.

Daaaade, you’re the reason my shoes are now on my head.

A guy who thinks he’s the most important person in Miami-Dade, even though he’s just another guy who can’t remember his own name.

Daaaade, you can’t even remember your own name. How are you the most important person?

Daaaade, you’re like a lost sock in a laundry machine.

Daaaade, if you forget your name one more time, I’m gonna rename you ‘Daaaade’ forever.