d1 babies

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5 views · Added 17d ago · 5 definitions

When two perfect specimens of humanity decide to breed just to make sure their kid will be the next sports legend and also be ready to take the throne from both of them.

My kid’s got the genes of a superhero and the attitude of a toddler who just got told they can’t have dessert.

I gave birth to a human who can probably dunk a basketball before they finish breakfast.

My kid’s got a six-pack before they turned six. I’m just here to watch them take over the world.

by Slangipedia 5d ago

A kid so athletic, they make you wonder why the parents didn’t just win the lottery and then proceed to have a kid who will take all the glory and also your future spouse.

My ex said our kid was a D1 baby. I said I’m still trying to get my life back from the kid who can run a mile before I finish my coffee.

My kid’s got a future in sports, and my future is just a divorce lawyer’s best friend.

That kid can do cartwheels in a hurricane and still pass my math test.

by Slangipedia 5d ago

When two athletic people have a kid that will probably make both of them look like couch potatoes by the time they turn ten.

My kid can do a pull-up before they can spell their own name. I’m already planning their college scholarship.

I had a kid who can run laps around me while I’m still trying to tie my shoes.

That kid’s got the stamina of a marathon runner and the attitude of a kid who just got told they can’t have a pet.

by Slangipedia 5d ago

When two gym rats have a kid who will probably beat them in every sport and also beat them in the divorce settlement.

That kid’s got the DNA of a superhero and the energy of a caffeinated raccoon.

My kid’s got the body of a professional athlete and the brain of a kid who still thinks homework is optional.

I had a kid who can do a triple axel before they can spell 'triple axel.'

by Slangipedia 5d ago

The smart kid of two gym teachers who also somehow got the athletic genes and the brainpower to make report cards look like they’re from a different planet.

My kid got straight A’s and can also do a handstand. I’m just here to watch them take over the world.

That kid got a D on math and still managed to do a backflip. I’m just here to watch them take over my life.

My kid got a D in math and still made the track team. I’m just here to watch them take over my future.

by Slangipedia 5d ago