B-string Underwear

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4 views · Added 15d ago · 5 definitions

1
The last pair of underwear you wore before you forgot about them and they turned into a sad, smelly mess that you only wear when you're too lazy to get out of bed.
My B-strings are so old they're basically a second skin and a third layer of regret.
I wore these so long I think they remember my first heartbreak.
I wore my B-strings to work because I forgot my pants and my dignity.
2
That piece of fabric you call underwear that has seen too many nights of bad decisions and questionable life choices.
These B-strings are like my ex, they’re still around but they’re definitely not coming back.
I wore these to the grocery store and my dog looked at me like I had betrayed him.
I tried to wear them to a party and got laughed at like I was wearing a sock on my head.
3
The only thing holding your pants up when you're too broke to buy new ones and too lazy to wash the old ones.
I wore my B-strings for a week straight and now I smell like a trash can that got hit by a skunk.
My B-strings are the only thing keeping me from falling apart.
I wore them to my sister’s wedding and she said I looked like I had been in a fight with a sock.
4
The fabric you wear when you’re too tired to care and your pants are too worn to hold up anymore.
I wore my B-strings because I was too tired to change and my pants were too worn to live.
My B-strings have been through more than my last relationship.
I wore them to the gym and my trainer said I was training for a marathon, of shame.
5
The last thing you wear before you give up on fashion and just accept your sad, smelly existence.
I wore my B-strings because I had no other options and my dignity was already gone.
These B-strings are so old they’ve got their own personality, and it’s very grumpy.
I wore them to work and my boss asked if I was trying to be a ghost.
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