A'syaria

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She’s a fat, adorable mess who laughs in your face and makes you feel like a loser. She’s always high on life and never shuts up.

She showed up to my birthday party wearing pajamas and a crown. I cried.

She texted me at 2 a. m. with a photo of her cat wearing a taco hat. I died.

She told my mom she was a ‘legend’ and my mom cried. I got a pizza.

She’s a big, cute human disaster who can’t stop talking and makes everyone around her go crazy. She’s always high and loud.

She showed up to my class wearing socks with bacon on them. I got a B+.

She sent me a voice note of her singing in the shower. I got a tattoo.

She told my dad he was a ‘chicken’ and my dad cried. I got a pizza.

She’s a huge, sweet mess who talks nonstop and makes everyone laugh until they cry. She’s always high and never stops being a pain in the ass.

She showed up to my funeral wearing a T-shirt that said ‘I died for this.’ I got a new life.

She texted me during church with a picture of her eating a whole pizza. I got excommunicated.

She told my teacher she was a ‘baddie’ and my teacher gave me detention. I got a pizza.