A whole loaf

My cousin walked into the room and I forgot how to breathe.

That barista at the café? I’ve been flirting with her for a month and she still hasn’t said no.

He showed up at my party wearing nothing but a towel and I lost my mind.

She walks in and the whole room goes quiet. It’s like she’s a snack and we’re all hungry.

My neighbor is a whole loaf and I’ve been trying to convince him to move in.

That guy in the gym? I’d rather lift weights with him than my dumbass brother.

My friend’s crush is a whole loaf and I’ve been laughing at him for years.

She’s so hot I think she’s got a degree in being fabulous.

That waiter at my favorite restaurant? I’d rather marry him than my ex.