A Vulcan

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A guy who cuts his hair like a Vulcan and acts like he’s got a stick up his ass. He’s always mad about something stupid.

My uncle is a Vulcan. He yells at the TV like it stole his lunch money.

My friend’s ex is a Vulcan. He threatened to kill her for forgetting his coffee.

My teacher is a Vulcan. He gave me a zero for talking too much.

A tiny town in Alberta that’s obsessed with Star Trek. They’re like, ‘We’re the real deal, and you’re just a fan.’

I visited Vulcan, Alberta. There’s a giant ship outside town. It’s like a giant trash can from a spaceship.

The town has a Star Trek museum. The sign said, ‘We’re not just a town. We’re a vibe.’

Vulcan has a space station. It’s just a visitor center. But it’s cool.

A weird sexual thing where you stick two fingers in the vag and two in the butt. It’s like a finger party.

My friend tried the Vulcan. He said it felt like being stabbed by a sandwich.

My mom did the Vulcan. She said it was like having a finger in each hole of a donut.

At the party, the guy did the Vulcan. The whole room was confused.

Telling someone to stop being a drama queen and just think straight.

My brother got yelled at for being a drama queen. He was told to be logical.

My teacher told me to think like a Vulcan. I was confused.

My friend was being a mess. I told him to be a Vulcan.

Two in the pink, two in the stink. Then you do the Vulcan sign with your thumb on the clit. It’s like a finger dance.

My girlfriend did the Vulcan. It was like a finger massage for both of us.

At the party, the guy did the Vulcan. Everyone laughed.

My friend’s mom did the Vulcan. It was like she was doing a finger workout.

You make the Vulcan sign and stick two fingers in the vag and two in the butt. It’s like a finger sandwich.

My friend did the Vulcan. He said it was like getting a finger sandwich.

At the gym, my friend did the Vulcan. He said it was like a finger workout.

My sister did the Vulcan. She said it was the best finger sandwich she ever had.

A bunch of space aliens from a faraway planet who are always calm and logical. They’re like the cool kids of the universe.

Spock is a Vulcan. He’s always calm and logical.

My teacher said Vulcans are like the cool kids in school.

My friend thinks Vulcans are the best. He wants to be one.