A Third-Word Country

My uncle said, 'I got a new car.' I asked, 'What color?' He said, 'The one that screams at me.'

During the meeting, my boss said, 'We need to crush the competition.' I thought he meant a literal crush.

My cousin's zoom call had a cat, a dog, and a parrot all talking at once.

My aunt said, 'I'm going to retire.' I said, 'When?' She said, 'When I can stop working.'

During the meeting, my boss said, 'We need to boost sales.' I thought he meant he wanted to sell me.

My cousin's zoom call had a goat eating his laptop.

My uncle said, 'I bought a house.' I said, 'Where?' He said, 'In the middle of nowhere.'

During the meeting, my boss said, 'We need to conquer the market.' I thought he meant he wanted to punch it.

My cousin's zoom call had a raccoon wearing a hat.