A team Edward Chick

A kid who’ll sleep with anyone, anywhere, as long as they shine like a glitter bomb in the sun and drive a Volvo. They film themselves snoring just to check if guys are watching them and would slice their arms just to see if vampires show up to drink their blood. They also yell at pale, pretty people in the street like they’re on a caffeine binge.

A middle schooler who’ll sleep with anyone if they glow in the sunlight and ride around in a Volvo. They film themselves napping just to see if guys are spying on them and would stab themselves just to see if vampires show up. They also scream at pale, hot guys on the sidewalk like they’re having a meltdown.

A kid who’ll sleep with anyone if they sparkle like a disco ball in the sun and drive a Volvo. They record themselves sleeping just to see if guys are watching and would slash their skin just to see if vampires come. They also yell at pale, hot guys in the street like they’re having a tantrum.