A Simon situation

I flew to Japan for a stiffy and got lost in the subway

He took a plane to Brazil for a quickie and came back with a fever

She spent $2000 on a trip to Mexico for a pecker and a hangover

He bought a ticket to Paris for a quick BJ and got stuck in traffic

She paid for a first-class ticket just to get a slap and a beer

He flew across the world for a hard-on and a free snack

He took a trip to Thailand just for a quickie and a bad hotel

She drove 10 hours for a pecker and a messy room

He flew to Australia for a boner and came back with a sunburn