a minute and a half

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the amount of time it takes for someone to finish telling you about their ex and their new crush in the same breath.

My mom took a minute and a half to explain why she broke up with my dad.

He took a minute and a half to tell me he got a D on his math test.

She took a minute and a half to tell me she’s allergic to cats and hates my brother.

the time it takes for someone to realize they messed up and then blame you for it.

He took a minute and a half to realize he spilled the pizza and then blamed me.

She took a minute and a half to figure out she forgot her lunch and then yelled at me.

He took a minute and a half to realize he didn’t know the answer and then called me stupid.

the time it takes for someone to take a deep breath, think, and then say something stupid.

He took a minute and a half to think and then said, 'I hate math.'

She took a minute and a half to breathe and then yelled at the teacher.

He took a minute and a half to think and then said, 'I’m gonna fail.'

the time it takes for someone to tell you the same story three times and then ask if you got it.

He took a minute and a half to tell me the same story three times and then asked if I got it.

She took a minute and a half to explain how she lost her keys and then asked if I understood.

He took a minute and a half to tell me about his dog and then asked if I got it.

the amount of time it takes for someone to start a conversation and then forget what they were going to say.

He started talking and then took a minute and a half to remember what he was saying.

She started asking me a question and then took a minute and a half to remember what it was.

He started talking and then took a minute and a half to remember what he was going to say.